London Drawling Goes Away...Forever?

Well, folks, it's time to send the old London Drawling underground, at least for now. Maybe we'll change it back, later? Who knows. But for now, adios. It's been fun. We've seen lots of stupid shit together, haven't we? Oh, hell, who cares. See ya.

British Journalist Cuts Through BS, Parties Hard

We love Brits sometimes, like right now, watching this video above. I mean hey, sometimes it pays to understand your calling in life. Like when you work at some shitty UK newspaper and suddenly get shipped off to Miami to cover some "election" thing. Is it time to unleash that poet inside of you? To write the most dazzling prose you've ever written, all in the name of history? Or is it time to cut and paste from the BBC website and CHASE TAIL? Ha, nice one, mate. Cheerio!

Our Endless Post-Election Depression Ends, Sort Of

OMG, how long has it been since we've posted here! Four days? Five? It has been 1 million years since we posted here, oops SORRY BOUT THAT DOG. But why have we been so negligent here? Do we not care about our lovely blog that no one reads?

No. We have not posted because we have been stricken with this "Hussein Hangover," which is what we will call what happens when the only thing you have written about for months suddenly ends. What do you do then, huh? Here is what you do: Nothing. You stare sadly at the 1,000 news blogs you read everyday, and weep, and then turn the computer off and do wild, unpredictable things, like buy Matt Taibbi's new book and read it. Seriously. This stupid election made me purchase and read an actual, physical book.

WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO US, BARRY? Everything was going so well. And then you had to go mess this up and destroy Grandpa and his circus wench, electorally. And everyone celebrated, cried, hugged their loved ones. It was the ultimate high. And then, suddenly, it was over. We had nothing. We had seen the pinnacle of ridiculous, hysterical news cycles, the kind of news cycles we would never see again.

We thought: My god, what will we write about now? Should we write about the weather? Here's the story: IT IS FUCKING RAINING. Should we write about cats, which we love? YES WE CAN. And we will, starting this Saturday. Or should we say Caturday. But no. These are not what London Drawling is about. It is about so much more than rain and cats.

So, after a quick reappraisal, we decided that London Drawling would continue, unabated, reporting on nonsense. And so it will. But jesus, for a moment there, we were all lost and shit. About, you know, our purpose in life. Stupid election, stupid Barry, ugh, jihad on you all.

Shocker: John Bolton Freaks Out About Something

Well, we told you we'd find it, so here it is: That one guy, John Bolton, freaking out on the BBC last night about an interview with a flack from the Colorado Republican Party.

What's the matter with John Bolton? If he's so mad at the BBC, why is he on there all the time? Oh right, we forgot, because no one else on the planet can tolerate hearing John Bolton speak except the British, who can tolerate all kind of foul things, ie their food.

A Final Something To Make You Cry Tonight